By Father John Bayer, O. Cist.
Special to The Texas Catholic
Discerning whether to offer or receive Communion can be a challenge, spiritually and pastorally; but such discernment can always also be fruitful.
On our pilgrim journey, we are all vulnerable to moral and catechetical confusions. Sincere Catholics, including priests, can find it hard to hear or understand Church teaching.
With all the confusion, it can happen that a Catholic engages in some behavior that leaves him in a state in which he should choose not to receive Communion. Following Scripture, the Church is convinced it is crucial for us all to affirm Catholic faith when we receive (cf. 1 Cor 11:23-34). We are all sinners, of course, and we can all struggle to live some aspect of the Gospel. But our intention should be to convert and embrace our Catholic faith in its entirety when we receive; otherwise, we establish a spiritually dangerous contradiction within ourselves. With our lips, we say “Amen” to Christ; but with our heart, we say “No,” insofar as we do not intend to let him into our entire life.
It is better to affirm sincerely the imperfect measure of communion we actually enjoy, than to claim a measure that is not yet true. Communion can be real, even if it is imperfect. It cannot be real if it is false.
Pastors love every member of their flock, and therefore they will strive to eliminate such contradictions. For this reason, the Church obliges them not to admit to Communion those who are “obstinately persevering in manifest grave sin” (CIC 915; cf. CCC 1415). No one can see into another person’s heart, and therefore where grave sin is not “manifest,” Communion should not be withheld. And no one can be “obstinately persevering” before he has been lovingly admonished by proper authority. All of us, therefore, ought to be very, very careful about making judgments in this regard; there is much about pastoral care that simply does not belong in public discussion. Sometimes the only righteous thing we can do is pray that all pastors and pilgrims exercise their consciences joyfully in the fear of God.
But there are moments when grave sin is manifest and when the efforts of pastors to admonish have not yet proven successful. About such moments, I would like to offer just one thought that, I hope, can help us to understand and even admire the Church’s teaching about Communion.
My one thought is this: Authentic inclusion means truth in charity. To include someone, I must accept who he is. It is alienating to tell someone, “I will include you only so long as I can ignore the truth about you.” It is also self-alienating to tell myself, “If I have any struggles with Catholic faith, I will ignore them, so that I can try to feel like everyone else.” If we cannot acknowledge the truth, then we cannot truly love the real person. If we only love our image of a person, rather than the true pilgrim, our efforts to include that person in our communion are not authentic.
The Church wants to include everyone. Thus, there are steps on the way toward full communion. We do not want anyone to be left to themselves; and yet, we want to welcome everyone authentically, and thus to acknowledge their journey among us. For this reason, I love giving a priestly blessing at Mass to people who ask for one when Communion would not yet be authentic. I love publicly expressing the Church’s affection and inclusion of those who are on a journey.
We should foster authentic inclusion. We should not be afraid to welcome those who are not yet in full communion to participate in the life of the Church in whatever ways are authentic. We have all prayed, served, and laughed with many people whose convictions or actions contradict the Gospel. As long as there is no misrepresentation, we can share much with those with whom we disagree.
Pastors have a special role in helping their flocks peacefully journey and preserve the clarity of our communion.
For example, imagine parents who grieve to discover their child rejecting some grave aspect of the Catholic faith. They want their child to enjoy the happiness of living in the fullness of the truth, and so they admonish them. But they also want their child never to feel cast out, so they try to do everything possible to make their child feel welcomed. Such heroic parents know that “truth in charity” is sometimes a difficult ideal to achieve.
If pastors push onto such parents the full burden of insisting upon the truth — or even worse, if pastors undermine their efforts by contradicting Church teaching — then there is a great injustice. I know there are parents who pray and study and cry to be able to learn how to lovingly persuade their children of what they themselves had never even thought to question. We must all, pilgrims and pastors together, help such parents stand strong under such a frightening — but truly sanctifying — tension. If we abandon them, we should feel at least partially responsible if ever the tension snaps: that is, if parents become shrill and divisive or if they retreat into sad and lonely indifference or loss of faith.
Truth in charity — what a beautiful call. No matter where we are on our pilgrim journey, surely we can agree to follow this call together.
Father John Bayer, O. Cist., is a monk at the Cistercian Abbey of Our Lady of Dallas in Irving.
Cutline for featured image: Archbishop Rino Fisichella, pro-prefect of the Dicastery for Evangelization’s section for new evangelization and the chief organizer of the Holy Year 2025, elevates the Eucharist during Mass in the Basilica of Sant’Andrea della Valle March 30, 2025, in Rome. (CNS photo/Pablo Esparza)
